April 28, 2010 Things I’d do if I had the power.

Ok, now firstly you should know that I am a little bit of a geek so things written here may be slightly skewed to the sci fi corner of the spectrum, but you know what do I care? This is my blog and I’ll blog on if I want to.

So this is not about writing so much per se, but I had a good writing day and was indulging in a bit of the old web surfing and got to thinking about what I’d like to do to get rid of some of the stuff out there that is perhaps as entertaining and valuable as serving hamsters stuffed with caterpillars to a vegetarian. Really it’s not wanted.

So if I had absolute power and could corrupt things to my way of thinking absoulutely here are my 5 edicts:

1. Joss Whedon would have to do another season of Firefly. I know, some might say it’s been too long, that Alan Tudyk couldn’t be in it, that Morena would need hair extensions or that the Captain’s pants might have to be loosened, but I say – Don’t Care. It will be done. And in it we shall find out about Book gorram it! And Wash could come back as a ghost or something. It’s ok, Joss will figure something out. You know he’s god don’t you?

2. Reality tv competition cooking shows would be banned. Yes, that’s it. BANNED. Enough of the engineered drama of a soupy risotto, stop the dramatic orchestral drumming to the unveilng of another soggy chicken pie. And don’t get me started on those chefs. Just because you can make a killer souffle does not give you the right to turn into a narcissistic sociopath. 

3. No more vampire love stories or vampire schools stories can be published for two years. Really, I think there’s enough already. How about a zombie love triangle? Or Love in the time of Leprosy. No? You know Edward and Jacob aren’t real don’t you??

4. Anyone using a mobile phone at the cinema or theatre would be magically ejected – painfully – by the demon of eviction. No exceptions. And maybe it could even happen to people who have inappropriately loud conversations on public transport as well. 

5. News programs would actually have to contain news. It’s ok, we could still have all that info-tainment masquerading as news, but it can’t call itself news anymore. Headlining with a story about Tiger Woods or some other celebrity’s love squabbles is not news. It just isn’t.

April 19, 2010 Back in the saddle

I can’t believe it’s been so long since I blogged, sheesh, can hardly move here for the virtual cobwebs but have armed myself with a big can of cobwebs-be-gone and am clearing the air for an assault on the keyboard….let the spewing of words commence. 

So today I’m back in typing mode after a ten day sojourn in the wilds of Asia. Ok it was a long way from wild and there was room service but the traffic was wild so that’s something. One of the things I love about travelling though is the opportunity to eavesdrop on people from  many nations. Breakfast at a hotel is always great for me – not so much for my breakfast partner whose conversation is often met by a blank stare as I crane my neck sideways trying to listen to the next table. Note to writers: eavesdropping is not rude if you’re a writer. Really, I’m sure that’s written in the secret writers’ handbook.

So odd things heard at breakfast: ‘Im very particular about my jam.’ Says older man with slicked back hair trying to convince younger woman he is worldly. Gag. 

“I’ve been to Barcelona and I don’t know why anyone would want to go. It smells and everyone takes a nap in the afternoon.’ Says the super thin woman to her expensively shoed breakfast partner.  A: I wonder where she actually went in this, one of the best cities in Europe. Did she miss Gaudi’s amazing concotions of stone and curliqued glass? Did she not ramble on La Ramblas? Or perhaps she was simply staying above a fish market and had a desperate need to go shopping at 3 in the afternoon? Odd. And B: who wears closed shoes to breakfast in Asia?? Hmm. 

So now, on the writing front, the first book in the Rosie Black Chronicles is getting closer to completion and publication. I’ve reworked the title as well it is now simply called Genesis – short and sweet just how I like it. A sneak preview will be available soon so keep your eyeballs peeled and blinking for it.

Now I really need to get some work done. Ciao and over and out.